Dying Moments-Where Is God When We Are Hurting?

John 11 tells us the story of Martha, Mary and Lazarus. We learn that Lazarus was very sick, in fact he was dying, so his sisters send Jesus a message to come, but instead of rushing to His friends’ side, the Scripture tells us that Jesus stayed where He was for Two. More. Days! They even boldly reminded Him of the closeness of their relationship. “The one you love is sick.” I wonder if at first they were expecting that Jesus would be coming through their front door at any moment to save the day. I imagine that their initial confidence was eventually replaced with a sense of deep foreboding that He might not arrive in time…or perhaps He wasn’t coming at all.

 

Remember as far as we are told, there was no message or response from Jesus…they are just left to wait and wonder in silence. In the midst of their “dying moments”, many questions must have assaulted their anxious hearts and Jesus may well have seemed far away. It’s funny how we have every confidence in our relationship with Jesus, but when deep troubles hit our life we begin to question where He is! Perhaps you can relate to their experience.

Many of us will have difficult, even “dying moments” in our lives, where we cry out to God for His help but He seems silent, and we may wonder where He is when we are hurting. Most people will experience those moments when our emotions may tell us that we are alone in our pain, but the truth is our emotions can deceive us, because God PROMISED that He will never leave us, period.(Hebrews 13:5) However, the first words out of Martha and Mary’s mouth are “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.” Most likely considering the closeness of their relationship, these women had seen Jesus heal many people, first hand, BUT He didn’t come and He didn’t heal Lazarus when they sent for Him.

At times, we'll have painful seasons of our lives where we may feel like God is far away or has somehow let us down or failed us, even though we won’t admit that to others, sometimes not even to ourselves and usually not to God (although He already knows our hearts fully : ), but it may be there, like a nagging unanswered question…one that we “stuff” down whenever it comes to our minds…but those places, those lingering questions are the exactly where Christ desires to come and comfort us…AND  to bring new life where death has occurred.

Jesus shares with Martha that He is the Resurrection and the Life, but we may wonder if Jesus is the Resurrection and the Life, then why things have to die in the first place. I think that Jesus, speaking of His imminent death, gives us a clue in John 12:24, saying, “Unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it abides alone. BUT, if it dies, it will produce many seeds”. It is like the areas of our lives are like single grains of wheat that God entrusts us with.

We can choose to HIDE our seed, being too afraid to sow it in the ground, so it eventually rots, or we can CONSUME the seed, choosing to make our life comfortable and here the seed perishes and along with it, all its potential harvests die, untapped, OR we can choose to willingly lay down that seed, planting in the soil, all the while knowing that it will die, but choosing to place our confidence more in Jesus who is the Resurrection and the Life, to not only give it new life, but to multiply its number and its power! Remember little is MUCH when it is placed in the Master Gardener’s hands, and although sometimes, God may want us to allow certain relationships or dreams (or a host of other things) to die, it is so He can raise them up to a new and better life.

 God desires us to trust in His unconditional love and perfect plan for our lives, especially when everything in our circumstances and hearts are screaming against it. Jesus is the resurrection and He alone is the ultimate giver of life, He alone has the power to bring life where death currently reigns (having created ALL things, see John 1:3), so we can be brave and sow our hopes, our dreams, our relationships in the ground, where they may die, but we can be MORE CONFIDENT in Christ, knowing that through Jesus, we can sow in hope…hope of resurrection…hope of new life and hope of an abundant HARVEST! Death is swallowed up in victory through quality and increase!

So, where is God in those painful times, when it feels like a treasured part of you is dying??? He is as close as your very next breathe. See Psalm 34:18. His love for you is unconditional, His plan, perfect and His ways, are sometimes beyond our complete understanding, so if you have areas or times in your life that you just don’t understand why He didn’t come in on His “white horse and rescue you”, then consider joining with me, as we set aside our questions and hear the voice of Jesus saying “Blessed are they who do not see and yet believe”

For me, I have decided to make the choice that even if it may have looked like it on the outside, even if others around me said so, even if I struggled with it on the inside, God has never failed me or loosened His firm grasp on my life or yours! I know that someday I WILL understand fully God’s plan for me, but until that day, I will keep believing, keep trusting in His unconditional love and the perfection of His plan. I will in time, along with you, recognize that He was right all along and His plan for us was GOOD! Although circumstances may at times, cloud our view of the Lord, He is, never-the-less there, present with us always…so don’t judge the book before it is completely written…the Father has more in store for us, that our hearts have not even begun to dream of…just keep watching, keep waiting, keep trusting, keep believing!